It's kind of like hanging out with your platonic female divorced friend and hearing her perspective on your divorce and your love life issues.Reply I guess this is less of a comment and more of a question for advice. I have been seperated now for almost 6 months, although I have been both emotionally and physically removed from my marriage for almost a decade. I sat across from a woman who turned my dormant heart and soul flowing again and I simply can't explain in words the feeling - it was something I almost didn't recognize having been so long.I was..one of those guys who simply did not want to date. I had no idea she was divorced - she had no idea that I was getting a divorce. But we were never both "available" for either of us to act on our feelings. I guess in a way, we are going to take things slow but i really don't want to mess things up.My kids are my focus and that was truly enough for me. We started talking, reminiscing - we clicked as if we had been the best of friends for the 20 years, even though we had not seen or even talked to each other during this time (other than the occasional Facebook like or comment). Now, we both are matured, have experienced divorce and all it's tribulations (her more so than me) and professionals in our respective fields. Not sure I know what taking things slow truly means? David Reply I know that this is mainly a guys website but I feel hearing both sides helps in growth. I believe you all can benefit from it and start dating again the right way! I hope this helps and I am here if you ever have any questions. I went out with a very attractive black jamaican woman. My head is spinning just thinking about this gorgeous woman that I went out with.
I can’t tell you the number of guys I talk to who when asked why they got divorced roll their eyes and then just start complaining about what a huge bit** their ex is. Jason is right that you need a “story.” Not a lie, just a polite couple of sentences that basically let people know you are moving on, that you aren’t playing the victim.
Recently a client said to me “I’ve been out of the game for 25 years, all of my friends are married, I feel like a loser since my wife left me, and you expect me to ask someone out.” Well, not exactly, there are some steps that one can take to make the process easier: 1) Develop your divorce story.
By the time most men divorce they have felt beaten up by their spouse, their kids, and the court process. Their views on love and relationships may be shattered.
When you do start to date, you’ll feel more comfortable about your situation and be able to share with your date a story that is palpable. Too many men rely on their married friends for advice.
While it is always good to get support, only those who have been touched by divorce tend to truly get it.
In his guest post, Licensed family and marital therapist, Jason Price offers advice to help make dating after divorce a little bit easier for men.