But like I said at the beginning, every relationship is different, and what works for one may not work for the other. Urenna works within the healthcare profession but considers herself a minister at heart.We’re all different individuals, and as Christians, I believe God leads us in different ways. She has a passion for genuine and heartfelt worship and serves as a worship leader at her local church.Being physically attracted to the person obviously helps too.So, if you’re prayerfully searching and you meet someone that ticks the right boxes for you, why not trust that God is guiding you and take that step?There’s also the school of thought that says that you’re never going to fully know someone, no matter how long you date them, so you may as well take the leap of faith, sit back and enjoy getting to know your husband or wife in the wonderful institution of marriage. The obvious disadvantage of the ‘marry to date’ philosophy is that you could be in for a shock when you get married.In effect, you start the ‘dating’ process, whilst actually being married. Suddenly you realise that he burps every time he eats, or that she picks her nose when she thinks no one is watching.Somewhere down the line (maybe a few months, or perhaps, years), you decide that you know enough about the person to take that step towards marriage.One major advantage of courting someone for a while before marrying them, in effect, ‘dating to marry’ is that there are no surprises when you do get married; you don’t find out something major about that person that you can’t handle.
’ Both points of view have their advantages and disadvantages, which I hope to shed some light on.Having a long courtship period basically means that you have to wait longer, and not everyone is blessed with the patience to wait.Another possible disadvantage (if you choose to see it that way) is linked to having children.One thing worth remembering, however, is that every relationship is different and there is no ‘one size fits all’.Let’s look at the first; ‘Date to marry’ Some people see this as the traditional way of doing things; you meet someone, go on a few dates, decide you like them enough to enter into a long term relationship, or courtship, as some prefer to call it.The argument for this is that, sometimes, we over-complicate this whole marriage thing.