However, I must disagree with the majority of things you have said about bipolar. I must disagree with the "lack of showing affection" as being a bipolar characteristic, simply because my ex was the opposite. Holding hands in public, kissing, and he was actually the cuddler. The only time I ever felt like sex was forced was when I knew our relationship was ending, which was the last time I ever saw him or spoke to him. When it came to sex in public, he was actually not like that what-so-ever. They dated for a year and a half and he never got off with her during sex. He told me that if anything ever happened to his parents he couldnât go on living. So, I always asked them (my friends) why should they not be in a relationship. I know our breakup devastated him and he will continue to blame me for his unhappiness. I honestly think in my case he showed me aspects of his personality that he never showed anyone else before and we became very close at one time.
I think you just had a really bad experience with a man. I would like people to respond to see if your statements are accurate, or if the guy had other major problems going on. Although my ex-bf and I didnt have anything in common I think that is what drew us close together. (at that time, it was almost a month since he stopped taking the prescriptions.) 4. It took me a while to make him agree to let me go down on him in the movie theatre. However, he did mention his past relationships, and he never spoke bad of his exes. But I think watching others would be fun--and I am not bipolar. She said it felt forced and she felt he wasnât turned on by her. It made me feel better, knowing it really wasnât me after all, but made me feel sad again for him, because he is unable to be âintimateâ. He never pointed out how much money he spent on me. He also invested over 25k into our relationship, supporting my daughter and me for several months before we moved in with him, bought us both so many gifts and loaned me money for my business.
In the end, I said I wanted out and he threw me and my daughter out of the streets with no where to go. =( I really exhausted him physically now that I think about it. But if I asked him to shower with me, he never turned me down. Towards the end he became suicidal, talking about hating his life and wanting to die.
I wish I had done more research prior to my involvement with my ex-fiancÃ©e. In any event, it was me, (me being a masochist) who actually wanted to have it be not passionate, however, he always knew exactly what to do. I tried to tell him in a constructive way that maybe he should have the medication adjusted, and he would take pot shots at me, blaming me. Mine never said he was suicidal but did spent the night in a crisis center when I broke it off with him the first time and then told me about it after the fact. I just sort of blew it off because I hadnât been with someone that was bipolar before. Everyone told me to let him go, because I was in pain with his ups and down. Itâs been 15 months since our breakup and we only went out 10 months and I am still reeling from it. He wonât allow me to love him and he wonât accept it.
I am hoping by posting this I will help someone else before they subject themselves to the pain that many of us have or are still enduring by loving someone with the terrible illness...... And for the few of you that actually have survived relationships through this illness. ok, I have to say, I read all of that, and sympathize with you because of the pain... He's prescriptions (which he later stopped taking-- breaking me into pieces by ending our relationships) always made him weak and not be able to climax, he always make sure I was satisfied in other ways, and emotionally. The first thing I did after our breakup was to call his ex girlfriend and we had the best heart to heart talk for over an hour regarding him and I had found out it was worse for her. I would get many many dark e-mails in which he said the mantras are f-ing with his head, and that he was going to the dark side where no one could help him. Agree-- "told me he didnât think anyone could be as supportive and loving as his parents had been in his life" how odd, that they see their parents as their only link or hope. "said I would end up leaving like all the rest" they know it. They will burn through another woman and the cycle continues. And me being an unstable person as it is, I couldnt handle the extreme unstability he was providing me, however, bipolars need love to do they not? Im still so depressed over it (4 months afterwards.) but I really want to know... He now has sunk to the bottom of his darkness and there is no reaching him.
Itâs been 1 year and 3 months since we split up, and I am finally moving through the pain, however I donât think I will ever be the same. Lacking intimacy 11.) admitted sending explicit sexual photos to women he didnât know on line and wish he had done more sexually promiscuous things 12.) said he was glad I wasnât into porn and said he was vehemently against it 13.) i found him posted on a porn web site while we were still engaged soliciting sex 14.) had dated 224 women, yet hadnât had a significant relationship since college 15.) said he had done inappropriate things in the past that he didnât want to go into 16.) told me watching others have sex would be fun 17.) extraordinarily bright, but emotionally immature 18.) proposed marriage within 3 months 19.) one day he was up the next he was down. He stayed on his side of the bed, again no intimacy 21.) demanded my time when he knew I couldnât give it 22.) said he wasnât into public displays of affection 23.) he had little to no friends 24.) his parents were over involved in his life, yet he was in his mid 30âs.
Though these warning signs may not fit every person with the bipolar disorder, I know many of them are typical: you can clearly see the warning signs of the manic stage (which I missed), mixed state, rapid cycling, and finally his depression. 1.) on the second date, found out we had very little in common early on. 25.) parents were in denial of his illness and treated him like a child 26.) he had a hard time getting off during sex with me he told me it was because he had been numbed by all his sexual experiences (in reality I think it was because of the drugs) 27.) he was very judgmental of me my family and friends 28.) kept track of gifts he had given people, or what gifts people gave him, had great expectations of others 29.) when introduced to others he would make comments about how no one seemed interested in him 30.) he frequently made comments about how much money he was spending on me 31.) he frequently pointed out my faults 32.) he was convinced I was bipolar and told me I should go see a physiatrist to see if I possibly could be.
After our first date he was honest and told me he had been diagnosed with biopolar ii disorder and was taking medication.