They’ll be open with you and yet something doesn’t feel quite right.
But bad boys aren’t the only dangerous men out there.The same women he can get in “real life” don’t respond to him online. He reminds me that each letter he writes that goes unanswered is a blow to the ego. Don’t let the process affect you; just be grateful for the potential that it presents. But the gist of it is that all of the experts out there have people believing that the way to forge a happy relationship is by playing games. And everything that you do that is in the least bit calculating is pushing you farther and father from what you claim to want – an authentic relationship where you can be loved and accepted for who you are. They value his ability to be a man, take control, make decisions, speak his mind and march to the beat of his own drum. Because they’ve tried to “nice” their way into women’s hearts and failed, they’re convinced that they have to start being jerks. The confidence that a man projects is the magnetism that draws women. Confidence without kindness describes “bad boys” that smart woman have long ago given up.I remind him that at a party, she doesn’t have a hundred men lined up to talk to her. The strength of online dating lies in its ability to give us access to total strangers; the downside is how difficult it is to keep their attention. Finally, we get to talking about the woman he’s writing to. I wrote about this extensively in a chapter from “Why You’re Still Single” creatively called “Don’t Play Games”, but to reiterate: NOTHING GOOD COMES OUT OF PLAYING GAMES. None of those things prevent a guy from being nice. Kindness without confidence is the charge against the wishy-washy “nice guys”.Women don’t like to be treated badly, and they’re not looking for a jerk to treat them badly.While I’m not criticizing the seduction community, it’s important to understand where they fit in.You are easy and “good enough” to fill the time until that special woman comes along. He talks about the future without including you specifically. He attends to your needs more than his own, usually out of guilt for not feeling fully engaged with you. He avoids disagreements preferring always to keep things status quo between you. When you ask him directly how he feels about you, he’s unsure and indirect.